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Monday, September 16, 2013

SLOW THINKING & SUMMING UP

Having Asperger's Syndrome means I am a slow thinker, a slow cognitive processor, which means I am not good at thinking on my feet.
I need time to process information.
This makes it difficult to protect myself from verbal abuse.
The man who got stuck into me the other night about never having married did not know I had AS, but he must have picked up on my vulnerability.
I think 'normal' people are constantly sizing each other up, both consciously and unconsciously, working out if others are safe, able to be taken advantage of, etc.
This self-protective or predatory behaviour is not part of my make-up, probably because I cannot 'tune in' to other people.
It's an emotional thing, and my emotions have been shut down, permanently frozen I believe since my traumatic birth.
Now that I am aware of it, however, I am consciously observing people in the street, tuning into their 'energy', and trying and read it.
It's been a real eye opener and exciting to finally discover a level of communication I have known nothing about.

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