Sometime I just don't 'get' something because my brain gets overwhelmed with information overload and my thought processes get spun out.
If someone says something offensive to me, it takes days for my thoughts and feelings about it to come to the surface.
This means I can't do anything about it at the time which I need to be able to do in order to defend or protect myself.
Knowing this does not make any difference to the process.
I need to have someone supportive who knows about AS with me when I see doctors, but I do not have such a person.